Living sacrifice

Two and a half weeks later... what has changed?

I guess I'll start with Charlie and his behaviors.  

They have improved.  Greatly.

There are a number of theories as to what caused this child to behave the way he did at the end of August.  Is it because school is starting (I've been warned he often acts out at the start of each year), and a new school at that?  Is it because there was a lot of flux and confusion even among staff those first few weeks of school?  Is it because the adoption date is still up in the air?  Is it because Josh, another male adult, has moved out (left him)?  Is it because he's reliving traumas inside that he cannot verbalize or correctly handle?  Is it some of that, all of that, or none of that?  I don't know.  Probably only God knows.  Even the therapists nod and say, "Yeah, could be."

On my birthday, I took a day off from home obligations and went with my Beth friend out to Greeley to take some stuff to Josh at school and take him to lunch.  It was a wonderful, relaxing time.  Because I didn't make it back to town in time, Ro picked up Charlie from school and texted me that he said he had a perfect day.  Well, my Charlie is known to - let's say - experiment - with truth - so I emailed his teacher to confirm.  And while he did not have a perfect day in her eyes, he was pretty stinking close to it for him.  

We went to dinner as a family and Charlie seemed to be a different kid.  It was the most relaxing and enjoyable family meal I've experienced in quite a long time.  That day marked a turning point, and for the most part, Charlie has been behaving really, really well.

Why?  Again, who knows?  New therapy we began?  (Maybe, but it was still in the rapport-building stage.)  More rhythm and routine at school?  Better parenting by Robert and me? (Ha!)  PRAYER?  I don't know, but I hope it sticks.

We have also come to a turning point - an incredibly frustrating and disappointing one - in our negotiations with the County for Charlie's ongoing support.  Things came to a rather discouraging head last week and Robert and I have felt the need to simply withdraw our requests and be done with it.  We feel strongly that the last six months have been an incredible waste of time (and money).  Not surprising, when you are dealing with attorneys and government officials, I suppose, but it's discouraging nonetheless.  A system that is supposedly for the children is not.  Maybe they want to be in theory, but the workings of said system are badly, badly broken. 

That said, we are anticipating final discussions to occur any day now, and the case to be closed, and the adoption date to be set in the coming weeks.  I am at the point now where I believe that adoption is what's best for Charlie, not all this bureaucracy and bologna.  Surely my God - Jehovah Jireh - will meet his needs better than our less-than-amazing County, anyway, yes?

So - ups and downs.  One day at a time.  (Do you remember that old gospel song?  "One day at a time, sweet Jesus - that's all I'm asking from You.  Just give me the strength to do what I have to do.  Yesterday's gone, sweet Jesus, and tomorrow may never be mine.  Lord help me today, show me the way, one day at a time.")

One final note.  How I love the living Word of God!  This familiar verse came to me this weekend with new meaning in this season of adopting Charlie:

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God,

to present your bodies as

a living sacrifice,

holy and acceptable to God,

which is your spiritual worship.

Romans 12:1 esv