Mr. Horst actually had to take considerable time off that year (the rumor was he had a break-down, but who knows what the truth was) and we had a long-term sub by the name of Miss VanPelt - who actually is a full-time teacher at the same school now. Even though he wasn't there the full year, he must have made quite an impression on me because I remember the KMET countdown (how disappointing at the time to find out what the WAVE was); the way he taught and related to us teeny boppers; and even the way (which I find myself saying from time to time) he used a random catchphrase - quick like a bunny.
I also remember going through a rough spot with softball (the details are fuzzy, but I was 16 so whatever it was probably seemed like a much bigger deal than it would be to me now) and Mr. Horst had said, "If it's not fun, why do it?" For the past 22 or 23 years then, from time to time I would remember those sage words of wisdom, and although the word "fun" isn't always appropriate, the gist is the same: Why are you doing what you're doing?
When it comes down to it, there is a reason for just about everything, right? There's always (or almost always I guess) an agenda. And sometimes we get so caught up in just doing some things that we lose sight of the part that's really important about it - the why.
Although I enjoy the flexibility and the freedom of summer, about this time of year I begin craving the routine and the kids being occupied with school. It's not because I don't love hanging out with them and doing fun things like the park and the library and stuff like that. But it's because the unplanned times exceed the planned-fun times... and idleness breeds discontent... and the fighting begins, and the complaining, and and and... and I get bogged down and weary of (1) going places and doing things, (2) correcting, (3) refereeing, (4) correcting, (5) cleaning, (6) correcting, (7) planning things to do, (8) (9) (10) correcting correcting correcting.
Thus I need to revist the why. Why is it that I have chosen to be a stay-at-home parent? Why is it that I bother with those things that make me weary? In examining such sometimes I can find new motivation and encouragement to persevere.
I've also been revisiting the why of my unspecified business endeavor. That actually has occupied much of my time this past week, because although I love the company I represent and the products I sell, and as much as I enjoy the actual work, the why of it is that I re-started my UBE because of the money. (And the whys of that also needed to be reexamined.) And when I looked again at the why, I realized that I needed to change certain things to be in line with those goals... and thus... a busy week, working and tuning and refocusing on my UBE.
All this brings me to my question(s) for you.
I generally get up, read my e-mail, check a few blogs (the number of which is generally in proportion to how much free time I have). Some blogs are informative, some humorous, some aggravating, some encouraging. Sometimes I read the comments, and they, too, are varied and in the same categories: informative, humorous, aggravating, encouraging. Some are signed, some anonymous...
So after a week of examining some of my whys, I'm now turning it to the blogosphere. I have some of my own self-examination to do, but in the meantime I'd be curious to hear yours:
- Why do you read other people's blogs?
- If you blog, why do you do that?
- If you don't, why don't you?
- If you comment, why? If you don't, why not?
- Why do some of you comment anonymously (I don't mean w/o an account - I mean those that don't even leave names or initials and truly don't want to be recognized)?
I'll share some of my perspectives on it in another post, if you're interested, but that's enough for today. We are having a yell-free day at our house today so I need to go figure out some things to keep us (all) busy. Prevention is the key. I think. :)
10 comments:
First of all, I really like the WAVE...hahaha! you're talking about the smooth jazz channel that comes in through LA? They even have a WAVE Sunday brunch in ... oh it's a coastal city and I can't remember where, but it's soooo good. Italian seafood, actually.
Now, on to the fun part!
1. I read different blogs for different reasons. I started reading yours, my mom's and your dad's to kind of get to know you better, or to have some connection to you. I read some stranger's blogs, like the MCK or Matt Logelin because they are (morbidly?) inspiring. And, mostly, I continue to read your and my mom's blog for the same reason. I now read your dad's because it's like a train wreck: you can't stop staring at it!
2. I don't blog..., see 3.
3. ...because I am a police officer. and that's largely why I never even stopped to comment. because what I do, event the most seemingly innocuous acts, are a reflection on my department, city and police officers everywhere. now, i argue with myself all the time going back and forth with being honest with myself and others, or being political. so, i continue to struggle. not really knowing which way is right. but when there are people like your dad who threaten to call the watch commander regarding my use of the internet while at work (an act that ultimately doesn't even concern him), i reconsider my desire to "be myself." what a paradox between childhood and adulthood...gasp! ;) BUT, I would really love to blog...maybe one day.
4. as far as commenting, you can refer to why I choose not to blog for my initial decision to not to comment. I started commenting, if I remember correctly, again because I felt compelled to (like the urge to watch a train wreck like your dad's blog). I thought, maybe I can get that person to see another point of view because their logic forgets about 'x'. or sometimes i comment just to say i appreciate that blog, generally like yours. but i never comment on strangers blogs, and i'm not really sure why. I guess because i don't think they'll really care what 'i' have to say...which is part of the reason i will no longer comment on your dad's blog...what's the use?! to be belittled and downtrodden. I experience enough negativity at work; I certainly don't need it from my family!
5. if i ever forget to leave my name, it's on accident. however, why should people leave their names. first of all, they open theirself up to unfair tactics (like your dad being a tattle tale). same reason I don't have a blog, because people hold your opinion against you and I don't think that's right. it's not that I'm embarassed of my opinion ever. but i don't want to lose my job! i have bills to pay! finally, when people don't know you, they can't make biased opinions about your opinion. what does it matter who the comment is coming from? is it the truth or a lie? that's really it. as if 'who' they are impacts what their opinion is? it really shouldn't. i think it's like being on trial. i think the jury should never see the defendent because it's a lot harder to get convictions on white women than on a black man because of people's perceptions and predjudices. does that make sense? read the book BLINK...really interesting points that make this connection.
peace love and chicken grease!
ap
i should have proof read because this don't make no sense:
"as if 'who' they are impacts what their opinion is? it really shouldn't." ...to many pronouns!
what I meant was if you (the reader) knows who I (the commenter, blogger) am, your opinion (preconceived notions, predjudices,etc) impact your thoughts of my opinions. In other words, your opinion of me influences whether what I am saying is true or false, as if you can't accept what I am saying because it is coming out of my mouth, as opposed to someone else's. People ALWAYS at the very least subconsciously do this. That's why I think it's better to give/receive information (opinion, not necessarily a story) anonymously. It *makes* people take more consideration of what your opinion is, not allowing the opinion's author to influence what is actually being said.
phew! okay!
-ap
i started blogging because i was asked to.
i find that it is a good way to keep up with family and friends.
i have learned about others
i have learned more about myself.
mostly i blog because for the most part i am pretty funny and you all are entitled to my opinion(s)
thanks, for asking,,,,,,
ap - You were banished from my blog because you wouldn't mind your manners and made things un-fun. Wonder how long you'll last here?
There is a big part of me that wishes I'd never written this blog. I truly didn't expect the antics from another blog to end up here. I really did hope to see honest answers to MY questions, and more of them. I know there are more than 3 people who read this blog and I'd hoped to hear from them, but it's all right.
Maybe they couldn't say anything nice... ;)
I have actually thought about my response to these comment for 3 days now. In fact, yesterday, I wrote it out and then lost it into cyberspace somewhere never to be found again. Anyway, I did want to say a few things to the commenters, short ones first:
GD - I have to say I was disappointed that you would choose to comment on AP's response rather than what I'd asked in my post. My questions were completely ignored because you saw AP post, saw your blog mentioned, and got pissed. Her comments, while referring to you, at least addressed MY blog, which is where you guys are. I sincerely hope you don't think that because AP has been "banished" from yours you can continue your rudeness to each other over here.
Geo - I love it when you blog. You make me laugh, make me think, make me for a few minutes escape the rut and look into your world. I wish you'd write more often but understand sometimes it just doesn't happen. Regardless, I hope you never quit.
AP - I had a long, long comment thought out in my head mostly based on your comments about anonyminity because that, of course, was the heart of what I was getting at when I posted. I'm still not sure what to do with my thoughts, though. Yesterday I typed them all out and they disappeared. Maybe I'm not meant to pursue that thought. Maybe it's another post for another day. But I did want to say this: when you allow yourself to comment without reacting per se to someone's often inflammatory words, when you keep your comments above that and refuse to play the game of name-calling and rudeness, I find you well-spoken and I respect what you have to say, even when I disagree with your bottom line.
It is so sad for me to see what's happened among our family. AP commented that she reads our blogs to try to connect better wth family - and I so get and appreciate that, especially when her end of the family tree and our end of the family tree were perhaps at different places as we were growing up. The internet can be such a wonderful place; I credit it through e-mail and blogs like this for allowing Geo and I to be as close as we are. I have found that in internet communities, there always comes drama at some point - but it's really, really saddening to me to see that happen to the very small, mostly family community that has been brought together through this circle of blogs recently. It's very sad to see our family ties not strengthened but weakened because we forget who we are. Most of us call ourselves Christians, but the bottom line is that "they will know we are Christians by our love."
Be nice. Love each other. Respect each other, even when they don't agree with you. Speak the truth *in love*.
And as my friend Jess keeps reminding me, if you can't say something nice, don't say it at all!
xoxo
Two last things:
MC e'd me to say that the KMET/WAVE event was 1987. (!!!) That would, in fact, put me in the second semester of my senior year.
And, I didn't intend this post to have anything to do with the other stuff going on somewhere else. I just was philosophizing over the concept of internet anonymity. If my post in any way stirred the pot, I apologized.
OK so one more - I apologize for misuing a word in my last comment. The correct word is *anonymity*.
Over and out.
Your response is well taken. The subject matter of my blog should not have carried over to this blog, and I was angry that happened. I apologize for forgetting the subject matter of your blog, and leaving your questions un-addressed. It was one that I found interesting and would liked to have offered some input. Perhaps we can visit that same subject again.
i didn't mean to bring the "antics" here by any means. my response to your question was truly shaped by my baggage, and if that mean providing examples for why i do what i do, it though it'd be appropriate. in a sense, many of your blogs (i thought) were perhaps reflections of other people's blogs as well..?
i didn't mean to say what i did to 'spread' what was going on around. i feel that that incident and similar incidents are what've shaped specifically why i do not blog and why i will no longer comment. i found out the hard way that the most unseeming things/thoughts/actions/etcera can bite you at a later date by the most unseeming people. but to be (indirectly) threatened by family?! i mean, come on.... that's a little more than 'drama'.
although i probably should have, i didn't consider the audience of the content of these blogs/comments and i do agree, some things should be left to the adults. so then, it's better i just keep my opinion to myself...perhaps our family trees weren't meant to connect.
-ap
I have been on vacation and therefore this comment is late in coming. I read you blog because I enjoy knowing what is going on with you guys. It helps me not miss you so much! I don't blog because #1 I don't know how to begin and #2 I don't want people correcting my spelling or perhaps my grammar. I think that it is so rude when people do that!
WS: Well just so you know, if you ever change your mind, 1) It's easy to get started, REALLY, and 2) I don't think anyone would critique you. I am anal about my own spelling and grammar and still make mistakes here and there - and so far no one has made me feel bad about it. :) I would love to read a blog from you!
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