Yeah, I Got Standards

I will totally admit that there is a double standard in this house. Maybe even a triple standard. (At least there is a standard!) But it's not about gender; it's about position.

You know that saying that the rules really get lax by the second or even third child...? Yep.

I was thinking about this recently when our extended family was visiting. The kids were in here watching SpongeBob. Now, believe it or not, there was a time when my kids weren't allowed to watch the old Sponge. I found it kind of lame and mindless, and a little rude. So, we simply didn't have SpongeBob on in the house. When Christianne started 3rd grade, her teacher had SB decor everywhere in the classroom. And since she was, what?, 8 years old, I figured our foundations were set, and I allowed her to go ahead and watch the show.

Josh was 5. It was easier to have the same rules for both kids, so he got to watch, too. Double standard?

Well, um, Grace has always watched SpongeBob.

It's also the same with bedtimes. I do believe that the eldest child should be able to stay up later than the others - it's a privilege. But in reality, it's easiest for us to put them to bed at the same time. Josh lucks out again, staying up as late as Christianne. (Often, so does Grace.) (I'm not sure if Christianne has figured out that she's kind of getting ripped off.) (Maybe I should edit that sentence out in case she reads this post.)

This morning Grace got us up too early. I was checking e-mail and she was watching TV when she came to me and said, "I can't find it! I can't find my stupid bunny!"

Stupid?

"What did you say?"

"I can't find my stupid bunny!"

I look at Robert and both of our faces are just shocked. Our other children weren't allowed to even use the word stupid until they were like 10 (okay, 7 for Josh), and under very strict rules. (I hate that word but that's another story for another day. Maybe.) We're trying not to laugh, because honestly, when a 2yo says something like that, it's stinkin' funny... plus we just shake our heads and mouth the oft-repeated Where'd she get that?

Meanwhile, Grace did find the little white bunny made of soap, grabbed it up, and said, "I found it! I found my stupid, stupid animal!"

It's sure interesting for me to consider how different the rules are for each of my children. Things Christianne wasn't allowed to do or say until she was 8 or 10 years old, Grace is allowed to do, or Josh was allowed to do at a younger age. Right or wrong, I can definitely see how my standards have relaxed in a lot of areas. I think in some ways, it's great - I've relaxed a lot myself. I don't feel like I have to prove my skills as a mom to anyone anymore (yes, I just admitted that out loud). But in some ways... I'm not so sure.

I need to go let Gracie know her bunny isn't stupid.